Cherophobia – My own fear of happiness

I actually searched the term. Have you ever laughed so much and prayed in your heart that you don’t cry as much as you laughed later?

That’s me, every single time I laugh, I smile or just be happy. I don’t know if it’s my luck or my destiny but it doesn’t matter with how much I get happy I find the same amount of sadness or anger later. like for example last week I was going to my exam and I was so happy for some reason, not for the exam for sure, I put on my music and rolled down the car windows enjoying my music and I just smiled. To figure out that I forgot my bag and I had to go all the way back home to get my bag. I know that it’s stupidity of me but accidents happens right?

The idea is that I am tired of being the game of luck or destiny. I am a happy person by nature. I don’t get upset over things easily, and always when I have a problem I don’t cry over it, I think of a solution so that problem is over as quickly as possible. Unfortunately, people around me and my world isn’t as comfortable or happy as I am, that every time I smile I know that I will pay for that tiny movement of my mouth.

It’s hard to be piece that doesn’t belong to the puzzle. It’s hard to always suffer for a moment of rest. But after all I will still smile 😉

Always welcomed to the corner,

Menna Xx

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s