Midnight

It’s midnight here in my country while I am writing this blog. Sitting on my bed, my back to my pillow, the music is playing and getting myself to sleep. But do I? Well, according to this blog I am not.

I am writing without checking the words or focusing on a specific topic as usual. Just writing for you and me. Because I am sure that this is most of us when it comes to midnight. Words, thoughts, situations, and more are clouding in your head racing with each other, making your sleep is either impossible or just making you lose that awesome feeling of falling asleep peacefully.

Those are the moments that I miss my childhood the most, when I used to sleep with a big smile on my face with nothing on the top of my head. Like now I think of how stupid I missed all the chances of sleeping when I was a child and all the mat time I made myself asleep at when I was in KG :D. I don’t know if it’s our minds that made our lives harder with remembering all the memories and deadline of our lives and bring them when you just about to sleep in or is it life that made us lose that one free enjoyment, which is resting and letting go of ourselves ad souls. That’s why sleeping is free. Not of money, or at least not only that πŸ˜€ I mean Freedom, like when you are sleep if the world is crumpling around you and you have nothing to do, at least you can break free of stress.

At the end of the day, Iit’s much of an advice as much as it’s something I know. Sleeping is such a great thing. Don’t give it up thinking of your exam tomorrow or that great project you are going to introduce to your boss. Know that without charge you can’t work just like your phone ;). As much as I will try to work on it and try to sleep peacefully without thinking of my missing university paper or my results or whatever it is, I hope you too try πŸ™‚

Wish a peaceful night tonight πŸ˜‰

Always welcomed to the corner,

Menna Xx

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Gave up asking for it

By “it”, I mean love, friendship, kindness, happiness, or even sadness. It’s like they are no longer things that can just happen or have. Even those are now valuable currencies that you have to work for to get like money or anything in life.

Now when my parents or elder people talk about the past and how things where. Like how good friends they had or how happy they were with low money and simple jobs, they just as any fictional story I have ever read. Sometimes I even laugh at how we have reached these days. Laugh with a crying heart.

Now to have friend you have to be really nice, really friendly and it doesn’t matter how good friends or even how “besties” you are, don’t give then your secret or at least not all of it because life and people are no longer as kind and as trustworthy as we hear or read or watch. Life and dreams aren’t the same thing. You wish for true love and you find yourself in a weird relationship that you call love but it’s everything else other than that. You try to trust that one friend, just one not even group as we see in movies and that one personΒ  makes you face the worst surprise of your life.

When I list those facts to myself or my mum for example, she calls me cold. The idea is that I have to be like that. I have not to trust people with my secrets or be too caring because I am not actually cold, I am just trying to protect myself from heart-breaking or an un smiley face. Unfortunately, that’s what life has taught me. I would never wish for such a life, such an act. But that’s how the drama of life goes. Who changed the rules who made people actors with masks and hidden hearts? No one really knows. Maybe us, maybe wars, maybe situations and conditions people until now passed by. Maybe all of them.

I am just wishing one day the rules would change again and maybe I would be telling my children or even grandchildren about how happy easy life I had and hopefully they won’t laugh with a crying heart like me now. I can’t lose hope after all. You too don’t πŸ™‚

Always welcomed to the corner,

Menna Xx